Growing up...

Collin is 17 months old now, and nothing short of a handful... but I wouldn't have it any other way. Finding him on top of the kitchen table, attempting to walk down the stairs, and throwing temper tantrums are all normal things around this house these days. However, with the rough moments come the moments where he blows kisses, or kisses the phone when daddy is on the phone on his break at work, or gives the tightest hugs... those are the moments that mean the most.

He is starting to talk more these days, although ball is still his favorite word. He runs to the garage door when you tell him it's time to go "bye, bye".  He is learning to love the word no, and shakes his head fiercely while he says it. He can somewhat eat with a fork and spoon, although he likes to steal mine.

His allergies are pretty manageable, although some days it really sucks. The allergist says that the only things he needs to stay away from 100% are eggs, oats, and any kind of nut. It definitely isn't as bad as we first though, when his tests cam back leading to wheat, oranges, and soy as well. His eczema still flairs up now and then, but nowhere near as bad and can be kept under control with a prescription ointment that is actually cheaper with our copay than anything we tried over the counter... it's only $7 for three tubes.

Seeing him growing up and becoming more independent makes us want another baby so bad, but so far... no luck. This past month was our 7th cycle of trying without success. My doctor found some functional ovarian cysts last year, and I am worried they are affecting my fertility, so I am meeting with a new doctor next month to hopefully get some answers. I am really hoping the problem is nothing serious, because we want another baby so bad. I dream about being pregnant a lot, and it makes me so sad when I wake up and it's all a dream. It's really hard when people ask when we are going to have another one, or I make one little comment that I am tired or don't feel good and everyone jumps to suggest I am pregnant... it makes me angry, sad, and annoyed.. but I try to be nice since I know they don't understand. I know God has a plan for our family and if another baby isn't it right now, I am going to have to live with that.

I start school in TWO months. I am so excited, but nervous at the same time. I can't wait to be back on track with my career goal, but its scary being a working mom, wife, and laying a full time college workload on top of it... but I am determined. I want to have my Masters by the time our last kiddo is in school so I can start my career. I know its a longshot, but I think I can do it.

This was all pretty much jumbled, but as far as life... it's okay right now. Eric just got transferred which is hard, considering he is pretty far away... but hopefully it will lead to a promotion sooner than later. I am so proud of how hard he works to take care of us.

I have been blessed <3